St Kitts Herbery Perfume Sample Set

I'm a sucker for a good perfume, and I tend to edge towards more natural scents - my mum wears patchouli and something about it always makes me nostalgic. So, when St Kitts Herbery sent me their perfume sample set* to try, I was over the moon. Ten 2ml perfumes to peruse and test out? It's be rude not to!

First, let's talk about how cute they look. Mini matching bottles in a sweet little gift box - so adorable. Having said that, the sample bottles are just glued in, it might be a little niggly thing but having them in a plastic casing of some sort instead of having to rip them off the cardboard would be a nice little added bonus. 

There were a few that stood out for me particularly, and they're not the ones that I imagined I'd come to love. Violet and Summer Rose, neither of which are scents I would normally use, I found myself very endeared by. Violet is soft and subtle, and smells like parma violet sweets taste, and is very wearable - as is Summer Rose, which is a lot lighter than I'd imagined, almost like a rose scented soap. Both are floral in a subtle, dulled down way - which makes them suitable for every day in my opinion. The surprise favourite out of the entire bunch for me was Rosemary and Bergamot; although it reminds me a little of aftershave, it is quite a unisex scent and probably the most wearable out of the set of scents, it's very clean and easy to wear.

There are a few scents I wasn't sure of, but definitely settled into an every day scent that I could see myself reaching for. Moonlight and Rose Maroc lie a little on the heavily floral side for me, but they are definitely wearable after a few minutes left to "set in". I am actually a huge fan of both Mist and Black Rose also, although they do remind me a little of cleaning products that I have. This isn't necessarily a bad thing, in my eyes. There are, however, a few scents in particular that I can't get to settle personally on me, but that isn't to say that they're not lovely in their own right. I knew Patchouli wasn't going to suit me - as much as I love it on my mum, it's just a bit rich for me and Geranium and Colonial don't suit me just for the same reasons, all are strong floral type scents and they're a little much for me personally, however my mum found them very pleasant, so it's just a matter of taste.

All in all, I loved trying out the different scents, and I think they'd make a lovely present. There were some that didn't suit me, although in a box of ten you'd expect that, and the packaging could do with a little revamp, but if I'm honest, that's just me being picky! If you'd like your own perfume sample box from St. Kitts Herbery, you can pick one up for £29.95 here.

Have you tried natural perfume, what's your favourite scent?

Sammy xo.

*Products marked by an asterisk(*) were sent by St Kitts Herbery in consideration for a review, however this has not swayed my opinion and all views expressed are completely my own. Please read my disclaimer for more information.

An Open Letter About My Depression

Dear somebody, everybody and nobody,

It's been a while since I've spoken properly about my depression - although you'll know that it's beating me down a little, if you follow me on Twitter, or if you read my beautiful girlfriend's post about depression in our relationship. Depression is hard - it stands in the way of it's own development, when you think you're back on solid ground, depression throws in pits of quick sand disguised as paving slabs. Depression is waging a war with yourself whilst making it seem like the fight is with everything around you instead. Lately, it's been winning the battle - but I refuse to let it.

I'm struggling to find a future with my depression - I stopped taking my medication, and as time went on I found it more and more difficult to go back to my Doctor and admit what a mistake this was; this means that whereas I was facing a battle with at least a little cushioning, for the last few months I've been going it alone, wearing my pyjamas. I've been selfish, and silly, and I've refused help - until this week. Things shouldn't have to get this bad for you to ask for help, though - help is there, utilise it before the voices telling you how you're not worth it are louder than your own.

Picture taken of my Cheekyboo Positive Thoughts Colouring Book

I sometimes worry I go on about my depression too much - I worried that I overshared when I talked about my ongoing problems with self harm, I worry that I put too much about how it affects my family life, relationship and future on the internet - but it's important. Documenting a struggle is important, showing a visual diary for yourself is important, standing alongside those who feel alone but might sympathise and relate is important. There are still stigmas to break, and my blog is barely chipping away at the corner - but it's important, so important I will yell on this tiny bit of the internet continuously, if that's what it takes.

I would be lying if I said that I didn't see an end to my life more often that I'd like to, but I realise that I have Katy - who washes my hair in the bath, gets spontaneous body modifications with me and kisses my shoulders when she turns over in her sleep. I have my family, who I might have disagreements with but whom are all fantastic in their own way. I have my best friend, who sadly knows my struggle better than most, and is always there with an animal mask to make me laugh and a reassuring word. Depression is ugly, and unpleasant, and so downright difficult I wake up some days wondering how I survived the day before - but I did, and I will continue to.

I am sorry for the last few months, to those whom I've been less than a great friend, sister or daughter to - I am trying.

Sammy xo.

Mink And Stone Swarovski Crystal Bracelet

I was one of those kids, you know the kind - whinging in a gift shop on a school trip looking at personalised stationary, jewellery or similar. I know what you're thinking, come on Sam, your name isn't that weird! You'd be right, only - seeing as I'm not a Samantha - whilst all my friends got princesses I was more likely to end up with a tractor (thanks, gender oriented products). So, I now love personalised things in a magpie-esque fashion, and so when Mink and Stone offered me £10 towards making my own bracelet*, I couldn't get on there fast enough (seriously, I ordered it right there, from Spain.)

You can pick from a number of styles of jewellery, from bracelets to different necklace lengths, to chokers. Once you've picked these, it's onto the good bit - the beads. You can split the beads in a number of ways, by size, colour, material etc. - and then start adding them to trays clicking the + button (or click the i for more information). Once the beads are in trays you can add them to your bracelet (or don't add them to a tray and add them straight to, if you prefer) - these beads then show in your "added" across the bottom of the screen, so you can easily get back to the beads that you've used before.

I'll admit, I had a few glitches. I struggled to get beads in the position that I wanted to get the bracelet even, even when I added one side and then the other, and so I had to make my bracelet a tiny bit bigger. I also struggled to work out the size of beads as I'd sorted them by colour and so there was a lot of trial and error, added to the fact that you have to fill the bracelet with beads completely - but it was all good fun. My finished bracelet ended up costing £13.72 as you pay by the bead, of which you're giving a running total, which I love (you can check my bracelet out, buy it or edit it to suit yourself here).

All in all, it's the little details that set Mink and Stone apart. It's the silver tag on the bracelets that add that extra something, the velvet pouches, them sending a photo of your complete bracelet before it's shipped out. There's something so special about making your own jewellery and feeling like you truly are involved in each step of the process - there's something even more special about the bonus touches put in by Mink and Stone to make the whole experience just that little bit different. They're a company that I'll definitely be using again.

Have you used Mink and Stone?

Sammy xo.
*Products marked by an asterisk(*) were part paid for by Mink and Stone in consideration for a review, however this has not swayed my opinion and all views expressed are completely my own. Please read my disclaimer for more information.

Fate

On the whole, I'm not a massive believer in that the universe supposedly works in mysterious ways. The universe works, in my mind, simply in a cause and effect kind of way - you reap what you sow, things happen randomly, each event provokes ripples and we ride these ripples randomly in a way that pans out a lifetime, a lifetime that could have gone very differently had we made different decisions, choices, mistakes. I say this, and yet - during the difficult times I've been going through, I'm tempted to say that maybe, just maybe, there might be a little more to fate than I'd imagined.

There are a lot of choices I've made that dictate how my life has panned out, and will continue to pan out in the future. I chose not to go to school too often when I should have been turning up, and that choice meant that I had little to no options when it came to university. Not going to university meant that whilst my friends were all meeting new friends, I was learning to play at being a grown up in the big wide world. I chose a life that left me bored, and that boredom turned me to blogging - I created Smekah, then Blinkered Barbie and finally settled here, at Little Fickle.

Blogging led me to events, and events led me to meeting Katy - a very peculiar set of events led me to speaking to Katy more often, and soon we became a couple, so in a roundabout way; I suppose not going to school all those years ago meant that I met my current girlfriend.

Okay, it's a stretch, admittedly - but for somebody who struggles for some control over her life every single day, it's a stretch that I find somewhat comforting; knowing that the paths that I lay today might just lead me to brighter skies tomorrow. God might not have a plan, in my personal opinion, but that doesn't mean that there isn't a butterfly effect already set in motion for your life - so no matter what you're doing today, or how bad things seem right now, know in the future you might have already set something great up for yourself. Or, as the saying goes -

"May the bridges I burn light my way"

Do you believe in fate?

Sammy xo.

Spanish Shopping Haul ft. Kiko

Okay, so you might have seen my first haul here but since Katy got here I got to go to Kiko as well as a few other super cute places and so I thought I'd do a slightly bigger haul of the things that I've gotten since.

I obviously ended up back in Clarel - I'm in love with Bonte and was very eager to make sure Katy loved it too. I picked up well more than I should have when we popped in, but top on the list was a body cream (€1,45). I have a lychee one of these already and it's great, so I picked up the Intense Lirium one to give that a go and also a soap on a whim as they were nearby and I'm a sucker for a pretty packet so I got Glycerin and Honey (€0,99) to take home.

The next two purchases were actually logical, The No Stretch Marks cream (€5,45) and the Urea 5% cream (€2,40) - I use both on a regular basis, only in the form of Bio-Oil and La Roche Posay Iso Urea which are a lot more expensive, so I thought I'd give cheaper offerings a go. I also picked up wild peach hand cream (€1,99) and bath bombs (€1,75) because I like it when things match and we were on a bit of a shop-that-we-don't-have-at-home high. When we were at the mall we also got some melon chewing gum by Trident (€0,75) because Katy spotted them by the till and was so excited it was adorable.

Whilst in Clarol I also got some Passion and Camomile (€1,65) everyday shampoo as Lush Happy Hippie is running out rapidly, and it's not so easy to replace in the tiniest Spanish village! I also got a Soft and Clean face wash (€2,49) and a thick vanilla scented lip balm (€2,39) which I'm been using the last few days and can't get enough of.

I went into Kiko feeling like I was going to drop a fortune, but I honestly didn't. I picked up a Cream Crush Lasting Colour Eyeshadow (€6,90) this is a soft pink with an undertone of gold (hard to get photos in this light, I'm afraid), and also a Long Lasting Stick Eyeshadow (€6,90) this is the soft pink colour 34. I also got a Clics palette as the palette itself was reduced to €4.90 and the shadows to €2.40, so I got a whole palette for less than €12.40 which I was deliriously happy about.

I managed to get a cute photo album (€19,90) whilst we're here for the photos of Katy and I, and although my Spanish isn't great, I'm pretty sure that the front translates to "You, me, and all the nice things that have happened to us" which I thought was sweet, and it has stickers which I love! I also got this (very crumpled) crop top (€6.99) from Shana which says "mermaids do it better" - a sentiment I couldn't agree with more.

That's it for the haul, I'm afraid I'm now totally penniless, pretty much - so I don't imagine there'll be any more to come any time soon!

What have you bought lately?

Sammy xo.

OOTD; The View From Every Rooftop Says To Stay

It's been a while since I was on here posing like an idiot now, isn't it? But, luckily I now have a blogger girlfriend willing to point a camera at me and take some photos of me (she's even nice when I'm grumpy about it even though I asked her to do it) and so here is my less-than-triumphant return to dip my feet in the shallow end of the fashion blogger pool. Maybe you'll see me here again in the near future, let's see how it pans out! Looking like the blonde Morticia Addams is both a curse and a blessing.

Coral Cover-up - Matalan // Floral Dress - Forever 21 (similiar) // Wishbone Necklace - Ebay (similiar) // Studded Bracelet - Accessorize (similiar) 

Shoes -Vans // Sunglasses - Primark (similar)

Bag - Matalan // Watch - Marc Jacobs // Hair Tie Bracelets - Primark (similiar)

Sad to say any further fashion posts probably won't involve this much sunlight and/or bare skin.

Sammy xo.

Summer Skincare Routine

I am so pale, it's painful. My Dad likes to joke, and has done all the way through my childhood when I inevitably burned and ended up looking like overcooked bacon, that my natural colour is pale blue, I go white in the sun and then, if I'm not careful, skip straight to bright red. As such, Summer really takes it out of my skin - I tend to end up with red, flaky and majorly broken out skin, it's a real curse. As such, I have to really tailor my skincare to fit the weather that I'm in, so when travelling to Spain and knowing it was going to be particularly hot, I figured the best thing to do was to try some new bits and bobs - When in Rome (Spain) and all that. You might have seen what I picked up when I did my Clarel haul, but I'll tell you what I've been using.

I've been starting with the bonte cleansing wipes - I know this is against every beauty blogger law ever set - but honestly, I can't risk leaving any make-up behind so I use these as my first hit. As make up wipes go, these are pretty average. They're on the dry side, but easily take off eye make-up and are soft on skin (I've used the sensitive ones in the past, but they're around the €1.50 mark, whereas I think I paid about ninety cents for these). Not horrendous, but I probably wouldn't use them on their own as I do have a lot of make-up still clogging up pores and whatnot when I'm done (maybe that's my skills though, admittedly.)

It's just purely because bonte is by far the most affordable brand in my village that everything here is by them - but I've also been using their sensitive micellar water and toner. At home I've found micellar waters to either be very sort of dry (I know they're a liquid, but I don't know how better to describe it) and leave a sort of residue, or to be quite, well, wet. This is definitely one that lies on the wet side - I find I have to sort of pat it into my skin, but it really does take the remaining make-up off, I'd definitely put it up there with bioderma (is that a big claim?) although it does smell quite flowery, which I'm on the fence about. I got sensitive in both this and the toner as I'm never sure how my skin will react, especially when I'm already up against the heat - but they've worked really well for me. The toner has a similar floral smell to the micellar water (I like it when things match) and leaves no sticky "layer" on my skin. My skin just feels fresh and soft, which I love. Not bad, when I got both for under €5 combined!

Last but not least, I've been using their everyday moisturizer. This reminds me a lot of a cold cream (I used to be a massive fan of using Ponds over here but it often felt like sleeping in a face mask, and this is half of the price.) but it sinks in incredibly fast, like to the extent where some nights I'm almost sure I've done my cheeks or forehead twice because I couldn't tell if it'd been put on and soaked in or I hadn't put any there yet. This has a less floral smell than the toner and micellar water, it's quite clean smelling - they do a separate spf day and night cream that I think I'm going to bring home to have a go at!

All in all, bonte seems to be the Spanish brand to beat, especially at such affordable prices - I'll be stocking up to bring it home. For somebody that really struggles with their skin in high temperatures, bonte has definitely made it a doddle.

What are your Summer skin saviours?

Sammy xo.

Tattoos, Same Sex Relationships, and The Drop In Blood Donation

When I was seveteen, I was ecstatic to be able to give blood - and yet I forget and when I hit eighteen I was more excited to get a tattoo, which meant waiting four months before I could give blood. By then, I had another one, and by that four months being over - I had both touched up. Admittedly, I keep meaning to give blood - but something, whether it be a new piercing or tattoo, always gets in the way. It seems that I'm not the only one, as according to The Independent, there's been a 40% drop in those turning out to give blood in the last year, compared to a decade ago.

It would be ridiculous to call this anything other than a crisis - the levels of blood needed never really decrease, and yet the blood coming in seems to - so is there anything we can do about it? Actually, yes. I mean, to stop getting tattoos would be one - but, there is still a law in our country, that irregardless of whether the sex had was safe or not - men cannot give blood within a year of having anal or oral sex with another man - nor can a woman who has slept with a man who fits that description. These laws generally came into play across a number of nations in the 1980's, with many banning gay men giving blood at all - but that was a very different time. We now, surely, know better.

More people than ever seemingly openly identify with the prospect of falling outside of the realms of traditional heterosexual relationships - and this causes a problem with regards to blood donation. In a world where we need more blood donations than ever, we are isolating a huge chunk of the population. For a man in a relationship with a man, in order to give blood as well, he must essentially abstain from any sexual contact for a year before hand to be able to do so (this article written by a French Nurse's Aide talks about the frustration of being gay and wanting to give blood.)

(regulations copied from www.blood.co.uk)

HIV is, indeed, more commonly identified overall in gay men than any other sexual orientation group, but that isn't to say that they are the only carriers, nor that every single gay man is a carrier. We have made leaps and bounds within the realms and ideas of HIV, prevention, how it's spread - and as such, this rule seems outdated. Unsafe sex is unsafe sex, and the rules should be the same for all sexual orientations. If sex is safe, whether the participants are male, female or a non-binary gender should be irregardless - or at least in the sense of giving blood. Blood is, after all, blood - it runs the same in all of us, whether you lust after Cara Delevigne or Zac Efron. 

Treating men who sleep with men the same as those who pose a much higher risk, those injecting drugs for instance, is an outdated idea - the regulations were made for the 80's, it's 30 or so years on, and it's time we realised that, far from being a problem, men who sleep with men donating blood might just be a glaringly obvious solution.

Have you ever given blood?

Sammy xo.

The Thirteenth Tale - Book Review

"Angelfield House stands abandoned and forgotten. It was once the imposing home of the March family - fascinating, manipulative Isabelle, Charlie, her brutal and dangerous brother, and the wild, untamed twins, Emmeline and Adeline. But Angelfield House conceals a chilling secret whose impact still resonates...

Now Margaret Lea is investigating Angelfield'd past - and the mystery of the March Family starts to unravel. What has the house been hiding? What is its connection with the enigmatic author Vida Winter? And, what is it in Margaret's own troubled past that causes her to fall so powerfully under Angelfield's spell?"

I don't often find it difficult to get into a book. From the age of three when I learned to read, if you listen to my parents, I've always had a book in my hand. Yet, I struggled with this at first. The writing of Diane Setterfield in The Thirteenth Tale reads like a classic, yet is set in a contemporary setting - this, alongside the eloquent, descriptive narrative put me off at first, but as I fell deeper and deeper into the book, it grew on me, creating a story that wouldn't feel out of place in amongst traditional classics.

The story tells of Margaret Lea, a woman plagued by the loss of a twin whom she never knew, who set out to interview the reclusive Vida Winter, a famous writer whom has never truthfully disclosed her past to any reporter. Hung up on the idea that Vida's past might disclose information about the illusive missing tale in a book that describes thirteen, but offers only twelve, Margaret transcribes the story from the word of Vida. As Vida tells her story, we learn alongside Margaret - through the events happening in the present life, and the complicated stories told by Miss Winter herself.

The book is a maze of stories within other stories - dark corners and eerie findings, with thin lines between metaphor and true life. It would stand up next to Wuthering Heights, with it's eerie sense of something supernatural, something constantly hidden in the corner. An enigma of a story, so beautifully written that it's captivating. The book explores not only the complicated lives of those who resided within Angelfield, but also touches on the issues of loss, both metaphorical and more literal - all the while immersing you in a world that is so intriguing that it's easy to forget your surroundings (seriously, the book had me on dreary moors, all the while my physical self was in the sunny Spanish hills.)

There are not many books that make me want to tattoo the words on my skin, there are not many books that I finish and am torn between wanting to share it with everybody, and wanting to keep it a secret all for myself - but this is definitely one of them. The book, I am told by the cover, actually has a BBC adaptation, so I'll definitely be getting on that as soon as I'm home!

Have you read or watching The Thirteenth Tale?

Sammy xo.

Transphobia

This week, a birth occurred. Not a traditional birth, maybe, but we all served witness to the beginning of a life - that of Caitlyn Jenner, a woman finally able and ready to become the truest representation of herself. It might be a lack of knowledge, a lack of understanding around a topic that most people openly have no background or experience of, but the fact is - a lot of tweets that followed were inherently transphobic, almost without meaning to be. I wanted to write this post, but I was also reluctant - worried that what I said might come across badly, or I might be incorrect; so please bear in mind that a lot of research has gone into this post, a lot of definition reading and experience researching to try and best understand and explain certain things. It's also important to note that this isn't directed at anyone in particular, but if the shoe fits - maybe go back and revise some of those ill worded tweets.

(source)

Transphobia is, according to Wikipedia - "a range of antagonistic attitudes and feelings against transexuality and transexual or transgender people, based on the expression of their internal gender identity. When "Call Me Caitlyn" damn near broke the internet, the response of people was overwhelming, joyous, and - sad to say - too often, almost accidentally transphobic, due to ignorance (as well as those that are downright mean and rooted in unpleasantness). So what might have been said that's offensive, and why is it?

• "Man or not, she's hot" - Seriously, do I have to explain this to you? This calls the gender of a person into question, and that's not okay when the gender has been clearly specified - it's rude. There's no question of gender - Caitlyn Jenner is a woman.
• Purposely using the wrong name - This is so ignorant it's something I'm struggling to get past. Calling a transgender person by a name that they no longer go by, especially if you don't know the person personally and haven't talked to them about it, is essentially erasing the identity that they feel is the most them. If you do it accidentally, apologise. If you choose to do it on purpose - it's rude, ignorant and you should be ashamed.
• Misgendering - I lost it a bit about this yesterday, but to me this seems so integral. If you choose to use different pronouns (he/him) than have been specified (she/her) - that's such a crappy thing to do. Imagine if somebody just chose to misgender you no matter how many times you corrected them - you wouldn't like it, and it's not different.

There is also a lot of debate as to the idea of calling Caitlyn Jenner prettier than you being transphobic - but continuously reading about this, I thought I'd put it as a separate point, one that you can decide upon yourself. This is meant, often, as a compliment and a message of support - however many believe that it does convey a sense of surprise, as though the idea of a transgender woman being more attractive than a cis woman is inherently unexpected and surprising. It is worth putting thought into and being careful about using this one.

Honestly, there are so many more - but these are the most frequent ones that I saw - so, here's me signing off. It's 2015, and we shouldn't be here having to battle transphobia when strong women and men have shown us their true selves - but most importantly, have some compassion towards other humans. If it sounds like a dickish thing to say, don't post it. Simple as. 

Here's to the beginning of a brand new chapter for Caitlyn Jenner, here's to all the kids out there struggling with their feelings and having to read such negative comments, and here's to helping battle transphobia.

Sammy xo.

Clarel (Spanish Beauty) Haul

I've been banished from shopping at the mall until Katy arrives in Spain next week, so my make up and clothing hauls are yet to get out of hand, however - our local town has recently opened a Clarel, which is essentially a Boots attached to the supermarket chain Dia. I refrained from picking up too much make up as I know that me and Katy will inevitably end up in Kiko when she arrives next week - but I did manage to pick up some skincare bits and pieces for next to nothing which I thought that I'd share.

I am in love with their brand bonte. This is, from what I can gather, Clarel's everyday budget kind of brand - but in Spain to find cheap cosmetics, skincare and everyday use products like contact lens solution, toothpaste and shampoo is still a novelty, especially in a tiny village like mine. Bigger shops in the cities sell them, but a 2 hour round trip seems excessive, might as well just pay the extra! Having said that, Bonte has really made must haves affordable - plus their packaging is really sweet. I have a couple of foundations over here, but they're all quite heavy and, being as pale as I am, finding foundation over here can be a real pain. I did manage to get hold of this 6 in 1 BB cream in light for €4.45 - so I'll let you know how that one goes.

Last time I was here, I managed to pick up the bonte sensitive micellar water, which was about
€2.60 if memory serves - and I got along with it really well. It's soft and does a good job cleaning without leaving a weird residue like some I've bought in England, and so this time I got the matching toner for
€1.49 which I'm hoping will live up to the standard. I also got some sensitive masks to give them a go as my skin is quite bad, there's two in a packet and I think they set me back all of about a euro - so worth it even if they're not great, to be honest.

I'm a bit of a neat freak and I don't really like having dirty hands and so I got some wet wipe packs to stick in my bag, which ended up costing me €1.93 for 5 packs, so my mum has nicked some and I imagine some will find their way into the case back home! I bought the banana sunset handcream for around €2 last time we were here, but we only had hand luggage and so I couldn't bring one home which I was absolutely devastated about - but I'm going to stock up when I'm here. They do about 5 different scents, but this one smells like banana milkshake and could definitely hold it's weight against my favourite l'occitane offering that I have in my bag at home. I also got some cleansing wipes (bad beauty blogger) as they were less than a euro (90 cents ish, I think?) - I tried the sensitive ones of these last time and they were really good for stubborn eyeliner, but as they're mainly for getting make up off my hands I opted for the cheaper offering.

Last but not least I picked up a day cream for  €3.60. I stupidly forgot mine and so had to use my Bobbi Brown priming moisturiser the first few days we were here, which makes me weep at the amount of money down the drain. This is just a combination skin type moisturiser, it's got a soft perfumed smell to it but doesn't seem offensive. Only time will tell!

I'm sure you'll get reviews of these in the coming weeks - unfortunately I can't find any way of getting bonte back in the UK, but I'll be stocking up - and it's more than worth a look if you're off to Spain on your jollys this Summer.

Where do you go for affordable skincare? Have you tried any Spanish brands I should take a look at?

Sammy xo.