In the last few months (or years maybe, I've not exactly been counting) I've become a lot more confident in myself sexually - and this is natural, I think it comes from learning, from experience and from generally becoming more sure of myself as a person. Nevertheless, I thought I'd share some of the wisdom that I've learned about sex in my 20s (and there's a lot that I felt as though I've censored, because I'm sure none of you particularly logged on here to hear about any kinks).
1: Sex is amazing - sometimes the people you have it with? Not so much.
I've learned that I don't dislike sex, as I might have originally thought, I just disliked some of the people that I was having it with. I've found out that some people just don't do it for me - not looks wise, just it's the wrong battery in the wrong car (now how's that for a metaphor). Seriously though - don't let people who aren't good at sex for you personally fool you into believing that you don't like it; because one day you're going to see fireworks and you'll be annoyed that you were duped for all of that time.
2: Contraception is one of the best friends you'll ever have
I strongly believe this - and I learned it fast. Some people will convince you that nothing feels as good as sex without condoms; they're wrong. You know what feels better than sex without condoms? Not spending two weeks worrying that you might be pregnant, and not sitting waiting for an STD test because you're convinced you might fail. Condoms, the pill, whatever. Whatever you pick - just know that contraception is one of the best decisions that you will ever make for yourself long term.
3: It's not all about lingerie and silk.
For me anyway - it's just not. I always feel better about myself, more sure about myself, when I feel as though I'm not parading myself, as though I'm not on show. I've found that I'm much more comfortable and sure of myself when I'm wearing cotton and an oversized t-shirt, and I'm okay with that. I'm okay that I'll never be an Ann Summers model - and it's okay if that is you! - but it's not all about lingerie and silk; find what works for you and rock it.
4: All in all, sex is a personal thing.
I've learned that everyone likes different things - and one person's junk is another person's treasure, for want of a better expression. I've learned that it'll click with some people and not with others, and I've learned to have fun with it.
So all in all - that's the top things that I've learned about sex during my 20s; let me know what lessons that you've learned!